My First Impressions – Susan

I had some simple ideas of what the clinic and rooms would look like from the blog and photos Alan had shared from his visit here last year.  I was not prepared for what it really looked like. In preparing for our trip, Alan had described the accommodations as rustic.  I won’t say that word fits exactly.  I might say it is more primitive, although there is plumbing.

We are taken to our rooms, which are on the fourth floor, on the roof of the building.  There are narrow stairs leading upstairs.  There are two adjoining bedrooms rooms with a very simple, small bathroom.  The bathroom contains a toilet, tiny sink and shower (I use that word loosely) in the ceiling between the sink and toilet.

I have a look around at these incredibly simple and not particularly inviting surroundings and quietly lay down on the bed and wept.  I cannot believe my desire to feel better on a consistent basis has brought me to this place.  I have always been open-minded about alternative approaches to healing and wellness, but this time I think I have gone too far.

Alan is sweet and doesn’t know what to make out of my response or what to do.  I say give me some time and space, I am in shock.  I am deeply tired from our travels and at the moment cannot believe I have committed myself to staying here for a month!  I have the sense if Alan wasn’t with me, I would be inclined to contact the airlines for a return flight!

We go across the street for lunch, in another building the clinic owns.  Lunch has been left in containers and it is just the two of us quietly eating.  I am still a bit weepy and Alan appeals to me that this must be like arriving at camp; moving into a rustic cabin for the summer.  I curl my lip at the suggestion that this situation would be anything like my beloved camp memories. However, the suggestion does take me to thinking about how I must have felt upon arriving at camp and realize these current feelings were never present.  Camp was always a joy for me, even at very young ages. I don’t think I experienced homesickness or questioned the simple, clean surroundings of a camp cabin.  This is different.  We are in a completely different world; we have left the familiar world of comfort a long way behind.

I also know myself well and know that my first reactions can often be intense and that in time I will relax and maybe even be sad when it is time to leave, but I am a long way from that in these first hours.

We unpack our things, making the second room like a closet with our clothes and suitcases moved out of the way.  There are two large beds in the room where we will sleep.  We go about trying to make the space cozy and ours, as it will be our new home for a few weeks.

I fire off a quick email to my friend; Karlin who has done this type of healing cleanse in Nepal to get her first impressions.   Karlin writes back quickly and with comforting words, for which I am incredibly thankful!  There is wireless on the first floors of the two building and I am thrilled with the connection to the familiar!

On Thursday nights, there is a Yagya, a blessing ceremony on the roof the building, just outside our rooms.  There are two young pundits, or vedic monks dressed in colorful cotton wraps who chant and lead the blessing.  They build a small fire in brick pit and give us colorful a fragrant wood chips, almost like a popurri to throw into the fire when they say a specific word throughout their chanting.  There are about eight other guests who arrive; all dressed in cotton Indian attire.  I try to relax and enjoy the moment with the goal of releasing my shock of the clinic accommodations.

We have dinner across the street and meet some of the guests, who all seem very relaxed and happy to be here.  I hope that feeling comes to me!